Why I Post About God Now

I didn’t just wake up one day and decide, “Today, I’m going to post about God.”

This wasn’t some overnight transformation. It’s been a process. A personal one. A painful one.

For a long time, I was just surviving.

Between running two different businesses, working as a 911 dispatcher, and carrying the weight of back-to-back miscarriages, I never really had space to feel everything, let alone process it. I didn’t have the time to rest. To grieve. To ask God the questions that had been burning in my heart. I was too busy showing up for everyone else while silently falling apart inside. I took my grief and tried to turn it into productivity so that I didn't have to face it.

Yes, I’ve always believed in God. I’ve always known He was there. But it wasn’t until everything slowed down—until I chose to step away from the noise of my business and create space for quiet—that I started to really hear Him.

And in that stillness… I began to heal.

Not all at once. Not with loud declarations or sudden spiritual highs. But with small, quiet moments: reading Scripture early in the morning. Crying when I read a verse that hits where it needs to. Letting the Word seep into places I had buried deep. Learning what it means to trust Him—not just when things are good, but when they’re unbearably hard.

I didn’t start posting about God because I have it all figured out.
I started posting because I don’t—and I know I’m not the only one.

I know what it’s like to feel completely broken and alone.
I know what it’s like to beg God for answers in the middle of the night and wonder if He’s even listening.
I know what it’s like to carry invisible grief.

But I also know what it’s like to feel God meet me there—in the middle of the ashes.
To feel His presence when I had no words left to pray.
To feel His love gently put the pieces of my heart back together.

That’s why I post.

I post because someone else is where I was.
Someone else is grieving quietly.
Someone else is questioning God, feeling distant from hope, and afraid to say it out loud.

If my honesty, my healing, my faith journey can help even one woman feel less alone—if it can lead someone else to the comfort of Jesus—then it’s worth it. I

This new season isn’t just about slowing down. It’s about showing up—for God, for myself, and for the women who need to know that there’s still beauty to be found in their ashes.

I know I’m not a perfect Christian. I still curse. I don’t go to Church every week. I don’t pray out loud over everything like I should. But I try to. And sometimes that’s all it takes to get started down the right path.

So no, I didn’t just wake up one day and decide to post and talk about God.
He met me in the quiet.
He held me through the storm.
And now I’m choosing to heal out loud, so that other women know they don’t have to suffer in silence.